Dr Xxxxx : One Liners for Initiating Behaviour Change
in a Substance User/ Addict
I care about you.
I am worried about you.
I want you to do well. I want you to do better.
I want your life to become easier for you.
I think the drugs are hurting you – your health, your relationships, your finances, your moods, and your work.
I think the drugs are doing bad things to you.
The dealers are laughing at you, (when the charger too much / when they mix other drugs in with your heroin / when they cut your heroin with cheap additives just to earn more money out of you).
Holding hands is as important in helping a User as many other strategies. Too often Users have no one who cares.
I want you to have money in your pocket.
I want you to be happy.
The drugs are destroying your happiness.
The doctor says the stuff is cooking your head.
The doctor says this stuff is stuffing up your health.
I would like to help you get off this. Let me help you.
Do you want to get off drugs?
I’ll believe you want to get off drugs, if you write it down to.
(I will stop using).
(I will stop taking drugs).
Since this stuff is hurting you so much, why don’t you want to stop using?
What will your children think?
How can you look after your children?
Your partner may try to stop you from seeing your kids if you keep on using.
You cannot influence behaviour if you are not "on side".
I care about you and what happens to you.
I want to help you. (Under specific rules).
I want you to be safe.
There are 2 basic themes with one liners.
Firstly, getting onside with the person. You are not criticising them. You’re criticising the drugs. It is the drugs that are to blame for the person’s problems – not the person. No self-respecting substance user / addict can accept that they are foolish / they are stupid / they are doing the wrong thing / they are fools/ they are fucked in the head.
Blame the drugs. Stay onside. Keep the communication channels open.
Secondly, you are trying to get the person to make a commitment or to repeat their commitment to stopping using. The more times they say that they will stop, the more likely that they are to stop.
The slippery slope of drug use.
Erasmus : Roles of People Around the Substance User/Addict (FASOs)
Providing Support – Legal problems can be particularly destructive. Many people default to the worst-case scenario. The prolonged course to the legal hearing / court attendance may in fact be more punishing and harmful than the actual penalty handed down by the court. Relationship breakdowns can also be distressing and are commonly triggered by drug-related behaviours. Everyone will dump you eventually in the right circumstances.
Helping Hand " formulas
The magic figure for assisting long-term relationship successes covers:
First Formula 3:1 specific 10:1 general
It takes 3 small good things to make up for one small bad thing. It takes 10 good acts to make up for one big bad act. For example, it may require doing 3 nice things to make up for throwing a towel at someone. But it may take 10 nice things to make up for calling them fat or ugly or stupid.
Another magic formula for relationship success.
For relationship to succeed –
1. The person needs to be nice to you;
2. The person needs to be an asset to you (There are 2 areas in this – loyalty and what’s in it for me?) And
3. Finally you need to like the life they give you.
Each person should get 3 ticks when they ask these questions about each other. And every day you need to be able to say: I have been nice to the other person, I have been an asset to the other person, and I have provided the other person with a life that they would like to have. Have these things – and you have something that is likely to last.